How it was made

I've written a lot about the production of how to be god, but none of it has really gotten across how the show was made. This video is pretty accurate. Just imagine a year of it.

What 'how to be god' was about

I suppose it's strange that a show called how to be god doesn't have a lot to do with religion. You wouldn't think this from watching the first three episodes, which seem to be setting up some sort of 'world domination' for Ineptianity. But it's inept, it was never going to work, and pretty quickly the show becomes about something else. It's about this group of people trying to look after each other. Wash, even though he has a serious illness, refuses to let Georgina look after him. From episode two, where he says 'don't try to look after me', she is still determined to try. This comes out in frustrated punches in episode four, and then eventually giving into worry with sleepless nights and drinking.

In turn Wash tries to look after her. He almost entirely ignores Amy's problem in episode six and goes back to tuck up George, who had fallen asleep on his bed. It's a struggle, with both of them refusing to give in and admit their problems. By the last episode Wash has lost, letting George stand over and give orders - even though he does manage to sneak out for biscuits. Dylan and Amy go through a similar thing, except that it's one-way. Amy seems to be depressed for the entire series, and when the problem with Martin appears Dylan finally has an opportunity to look after her. She resists at first, but then Dylan does what Wash and George never could. He says 'I think you should let me look after you', and then it's all okay.

The religion has taken second place behind all of this, especially after episode five when Wash admits that 'he doesn't care anymore'. As his illness gets worse he tries to spend more time with the things that matter to him. But religion is still poisonous to these characters. The first Ineptianity event is too much for Wash to deal with, he'd rather stay in his room and eat biscuits. His relationship with Laura is pointlessly ruined by religious differences. He falls unconscious after trying to defend his religion to Martin. It divides these people and keeps them apart for no sensible reason. And it is only once Amy has thrown it off entirely that she can be happy. She says that the church has become 'just a building', it's just a place full of objects now. It's 'just a building' for Wash too, who says that it's best to 'stay right away'. It took about a year for them to realise this. The first shot of episode one is the church under a grey sky where Wash describes it as 'competition'. By the end of the last episode, where the shot returns on a sunnier day, it's just bricks. It's not a place for ridicule or admiration anymore, these character's don't care - 'it's just a building'.

There are some things that worked well, some things that didn't. I have favourite scenes and some that I don't want to watch again. It's not that cleverly structured and doesn't always go in the right direction. But when Amy walks into the church in the last episode, looks around, then walks away, it all makes sense to me. The last few minutes of the show are the best thing I've ever filmed. In the end people smile. That's good.

how to be god - Episode 9

Did you see that explosion earlier?

Episode nine of how to be god is being made. Honestly. It'll be the last one, so it needs to be a bit good. I've probably rewritten it about four or five times now. The main problem, now more than ever, is that I can't show any action. I can't have ambulances or hospitals or that deep sea diving accident I've been so keen to write in. I can only have people talking about what's happening. It's like someone in a no-budget action film saying 'Did you see that explosion earlier? Yeah, and then there was that car chase. It was really exciting'. But I shouldn't complain, it just makes it more of a challenge. Understated is good. I wouldn't want any of the characters to be trapped a house fire or something, it wouldn't fit.

So instead I'll talk about what I have got. I've managed to make a story with almost no resources and some friends who were willing to help. Without them it wouldn't be much of anything. And I don't just mean the acting. Many, many times they've pointed out that something I've written is mostly rubbish. So I write it again and then I'm told it's only half rubbish. It takes longer this way but the show is a lot better for it. It's easy to say what the show could have been - if it was being made 'properly', if it could have another year - but what we've come out with is a nice little show about students who are a bit strange. I'm pleased with that.

how to be god - Episode 8

The pirate and the zookeeper

Episode eight is in the final stages of editing. In how to be god terms it's a bit of an epic. Wash even had to wear make-up to give him that important terminally-ill look. Here's some images from the edit:

how to be god - Episode 7

An example of ineffable wisdom

Episode seven is on its way, then we're onto the third act, the final three episodes of how to be god. Maybe Wash will wheel out his almost-catchphrase - 'I'll be fine'. Maybe George will start punching people again. Maybe Amy has some nice secrets to share with everybody. But the strange thing about Dylan is, that while he was originally just the idiot that hunted road signs, he is now becoming the source of ineffable wisdom. He doesn't have any 'proper' storylines of his own apart from his interaction with the other characters. I didn't originally plan to pair him with Amy, but that's the way things went. There was definitely a Wash-Dylan, George-Amy thing happening in the early episodes, but this story can't progress on those pairs. The Wash and George relationship is where the real action is - friends that are both falling apart but don't want to admit it. They both try to appear strong in the eyes of the other until they can't manage it anymore.

An example of mild ineffable wisdom (if that's possible):

how to be god - Episode 6

Wrath of the militant caretakers

how to be god has finally ventured into the outside world. For the last scene of episode six (the others were filmed about thirteen weeks ago) we snuck into an empty seminar room, avoiding the wrath of the militant caretakers and generally being very stealthy. We got the scene done in an hour, then when I got back to the edit I realised I was cutting half of it anyway. That's the way these things go. Then, for the start of episode seven, we actually filmed outside. Where there's air and traffic and marauding children. It could have gone horribly wrong. I don't think it did. There was the problem of the sun getting in everyone's eyes and the cameraman got muddy, but it worked. I'm just not used to it. Every other scene has been shot in the hallway.

Episode six is also the entrance of big bad Martin, who will torment and annoy Wash until the end. I've left his entrance until a way into the show (although he was briefly seen in episode three - I plan these things), but I'm optimistic that he will be suitably evil enough in the last few episodes. After all, episode seven ends the 'second act' of the show, with the final three episodes being the slightly dramatic end bit. Happy ending? Maybe.

how to be god - Episode 5

The curse has been lifted

The cat that was killed by curiosity and not complacency has lifted its curse. I've put the cursed dialogue into an episode without anything going wrong. Episode five of how to be god is done. It's been filmed. It's been edited. And it's looking nice. No longer the rubbish 'sitcom' episode or the one where people hide in the boiler room. This has story and characters and significance. Everything that the first few drafts were missing. Admittedly I'm the only person who's seen it, but I'm confident it'll survive my co-producer's scrutiny. This episode has been holding us down for too long. There's a story to tell here. I can't afford any more reshoots.

Remember episode four? That was ages ago. We made the next one on a wave of confidence and didn't notice that it wasn't any good. So I rewrote it and then rewrote it again. Now I have it. If all goes to plan the episode will be around these parts soon.

Who's afraid of episode five?

Yesterday I wrote that I was going to re-shoot parts of episode five to get it 'right'. But now, the night before shooting, I have decided to rewrite the entire episode. It is now completely different. No more silly sitcom episode. No more narrative hole. The new episode five keeps the story flowing with a nice dollop of mild drama and jokes about death. The night before shooting the script I sat down and wrote it off the top of my head. This is not advisable. There's a nice creative urgency about it though. Every other episode was written about three months earlier. This one is barely a few hours old. I'm confident that is has everything that the 'wrong' five was missing. It will work this time.

This brings the number of ditched episodes to two. Two whole episodes that weren't good enough. They sit in the corner and cry. To add to their problems, I'm pretty sure they're cursed. They both feature one of my favourite bits of dialogue, something that I've been trying to fit into an episode since we started. It goes like this:

"Complacency killed the cat."
"Wasn't that curiosity?"
"Well the cat's dead. Just think about that."

I don't trust cats. Cats don't like me. This is their revenge. Cursing anything I put this dialogue into. Which includes this post. And the new episode five.

The problem with episode 5

Episode five is meant to be here by now. It really is. But after watching it, and watching it again, we have decided that it isn't good enough. Yet. Certain things have to be re-shot. Certain things have to be re-written. It turns out the easy 'comedy' episode is one of the hardest to get right. Without any drama we're relying on these jokes to keep the show going, and without the right pace and the right delivery, there's no point in showing it to anybody. Have I dug myself into a narrative hole here? Am I delaying the story by five minutes for no good reason? Only reshoots will tell.

Some things to consider for episode five:

• Is Dylan actually insane? Rewrites suggest he's not.
• Why is Wash eating so many custard creams?
• Why does nobody care about Gareth?
• Can there be comedy in a boiler room?
• How many lines can I plagiarise from The West Wing?

It will all come together. And then on to episode six. Which is considerably more beautiful.

There's something in the boiler room

Most of how to be god episode five is all filmed up. I tried to write this as 'the sitcom episode'. Unlike the others this is a real-time episode that's filmed entirely inside the house. It's inspired by the best episodes of Frasier, where someone is running around trying to hold everything together. Obviously it's still five minutes long, but it has a single focus. There aren't four plot threads going on at once.

There's not even any drama. Death isn't mentioned and nobody gets punched. But unfortunately for these characters this is also the last episode before everything goes downhill. The last one where they're all happy. Which is a shame. I'm hoping that the comedy won't disappear entirely in the later episodes, but I might struggle to fit in the jokes. If you've watched the first four, you're probably thinking that they aren't happy at all. They are. They just don't ever show it. A lot of the show is based around the characters not saying what they're really thinking until it's (probably) too late.

Episode five is also called the 'what's in the boiler room?' episode.Could be anything really. It's making sounds. It's good to use obscure rooms in the house. Especially if they're warm and you can lock your cast in there.

how to be god - Episode 4

A prop seen from a distance

Being punched in both arms

Filming has begun for how to be god episode 4. So far it has mainly involved being punched in the arms repeatedly by very sharp fists. I like things to be just right, so violence has to repeated again. And again. And then from a different angle. I became aware that this was happening because I had written it. It's my fault. From now on I'll try to cut down on the physical injury element of the shooting. For me, at least.

And the shooting 'schedule' is being interfered with by things like 'exams' and 'university'. I don't understand these things, I just have to work around them. For the first time we may have to start filming the next episode before we've finished the last one. My mind can not cope with this and will probably melt in some sort of organisational implosion.

I'm handing out credits and chunks of gratitude

Do people like how to be god? Yes, it seems that they do. Among the comments (of which there are literally several) are 'excellent stuff', 'i watched it with my flatmates and they reali liked it 2','most amusing' and, my personal favourite - 'lovely, kind of touching'. And that's all the comments I could find. But a lot of people are watching it, they're just not leaving opinions. In fact, I'm not really used to this many people. The Hoshuu stuff was nice, but nobody was really interested except me. Now I've decided to make something watchable, and people actually watch it. There's been a screening offer from a new Aberystwyth 'channel' and everything's looking nice.

So the YouTube page is going pretty well, but the poor neglected Blogger page is, well, looking neglected. And sad. Anyone that links to it, in any way, can have a credit at the end of the show. Along with my almost eternal gratitude.

how to be god - episodes 1, 2 and 3

The first three episodes of how to be god have been YouTube'd and shoved onto the blog:

Or you could go to the probably-more-popular YouTube channel. Either way, it's mildly interesting.